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So it's not easy, but if it's really important to both of you, and both of you work at it, it can have a good outcome.

PS: I think day trips for singles are a good idea, or maybe even three days.

But a longer trip, if you don't really find someone interesting, would be a problem if you were trapped, say, on a boat or mountaintop.

There's always a little bit of time if you look for it and prioritize.

For example, clean up the house every third day instead of the second. Once you prioritize, other things just have to come second and third.

Question from Stacy: I was thinking of joining a local art group that meets once a week as a way of meeting someone who shares my interests and is active — not the couch potato type. But just remember if it's a small group, it needs to have new people cycling in, or you won't be able to get any chance at meeting somebody important in your life.

Question from Guest: I am 59, and all of the men that I see are interested in younger women.On the other hand, if you went with a buddy, you could have fun even if there was nobody interesting there.So if you have a friend who will make any trip interesting no matter what, then give it a shot.But just so you know, I was the lead witness against the don't-ask-don't-tell rule in federal court and I testified for gay marriage in Hawaii, and for gay adoption and foster-child placement in Arkansas. Just because you have had some intimate relationships that didn't work out, that doesn't predict the future. If you like to hike, you are likely to meet men who like to hike in a hiking club.So please feel free to ask me questions that involve same-sex relationships, and I will be glad to try to be helpful. » Question from Sarah: I'm worried I have too much baggage to go back out there after a couple of failed marriages. On the other hand, if you don't think you know what ended those relationships and you don't feel wiser and more capable of a relationship now, then you should go see a therapist or counselor so you can solve some of your previous problems and get rid of the baggage. I haven't found anyone who likes to do the same things I do since my husband. If you like opera, join a group that supports opera.Remember, the ultimate goal is to meet the love of your life.

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