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I wrote it on a postcard I’d been using as a bookmark.

She said she had a boyfriend, but wanted to keep the postcard. My Tinder date was a master’s student from Valencia called Anna (her name wasn’t really Anna, of course, I’m not a sociopath).

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To arrange for an escort please call extension 5222 or use one of the emergency phones located throughout campus.

When calling, please be prepared to give the following information: your name, your exact location, and your destination.

Worse still, you will see people you know on Tinder – that includes colleagues, neighbours and exes – and they will see you.

Far more people swipe out of boredom or curiosity than are ever likely to want to meet up, in part because swiping is so brain-corrosively addictive.

All that’s necessary is a Facebook account and a single photograph.

University, occupation, a short bio and mutual Facebook “likes” are optional (my bio is made up entirely of emojis: the pizza slice, the dancing lady, the stack of books).

Once I had an introduction I was fine, but it’s that first step. I met Louisa (ditto, name) outside some notable church or other one evening while visiting on holiday (Tinder tourism being, in my view, a far more compelling way to get to know a place than a cumbersome Lonely Planet guide).

It’s difficult for a lot of people.” After just one outing, I’d learned two fundamental lessons about the world of online dating: pretty much everyone has at least one decent picture of themselves, and meeting women using a so-called hook-up app is seldom straightforwardly about sex. We drank cocktails by the Danube and rambled across the city before making the romantic decision to stay awake all night, as she had to leave early the next day to go hiking with friends.

The escort service is designed to enhance your safety and peace of mind if you must walk particularly after dark.

All members of the campus community are encouraged to take advantage of this service.

While the company is cagey about its user data, we know that Tinder has been downloaded over 100 million times and has produced upwards of 11 billion matches – though the number of people who have made contact will be far lower.

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